One thing I know I can be good at is striving for excellence. But on the flip side of that, I have a history of taking it to the extreme, where I find my worth in the quality/quantity of my work. It can be easy to allow how many things we do or how busy we are to become something we place our worth in. That’s why, in the current series at Real Church, this quote hit home pretty hard:

“Just because you can do more doesn’t mean you’re worth more.”

No matter how much I can do, or how far my abilities can go, I still need God. It’s a dangerous place to be in when I start putting my worth in what I can do because my abilities will have ups and downs as I’m put in new places, ministries, etc. That’s why I need something more stable to find worth in; that’s why I need to find my worth in Jesus.

I’ve struggled with my self worth in the past, and sometimes still do. That’s why this quote rocked my world (and is still doing so!). It refocused me back to where I’ve been finding my worth and why. So far, it has been found in my own abilities – how much I can handle and how well I do things. But that is so limiting! My worth is found in Jesus, and what He says is true.

“But he knows where I am going. And when he tests me,  I will come out as pure as gold… So he will do to me whatever he has planned. He controls my destiny.” Job 23:10; 14

I’ve been so challenged by the fact that even though Job had pressure to doubt God or try to take control of his life, he chose to have faith. His friends were pelting him with condemnation and accusation, one after another. Yet, he still knew that God is sovereign and that His plans are what’s best.

I’m so thankful that God is the one in control of my destiny – not me. And because we know that He purifies us through tests and trials, we can have faith in Him to have the absolute best planned for us. Now what I’ve been asking myself since reading these verses is, “Do I trust God enough to say that whatever He has planned is okay? Am I second guessing that He knows where I am going because I’m not secure enough to allow Him to have control?”

I was definitely trying to be the one in control of my destiny. But I can’t be! I know that I’ve only ever made big messes whenever I tried to wrench control from God. With a faith like Job, I want to say these same things to God myself. Because He does have control of my destiny. And He can do to me whatever He has planned – and He can even do so without any input from me!

“KEEP YOUR COURAGE”

This phrase is written in big letters in my notes from this week’s Love to Live it sermon series.  But it has become so much more than something I just wrote in my Journal.

It seems that God keeps trusting me with more and more things, it’s crazy but really cool! However, there have already been a few times this week where I have started to get overwhelmed by what God is asking me to do, and God just keeps saying to me: “Keep Your Courage.” Now mind you, God isn’t telling me to find what I need inside of myself, He is telling me to find what I need in Him- who is my strength and courage. He is saying: “Be strong and COURAGEOUS. Don’t be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go” (Joshua 1:9) 

Not only do I need to keep my courage in the big tasks that God has assigned me, I have to practice courage in daily life- wherever I go! Courage has to be a part of my DNA- when I keep Jesus’ courage everyday, I won’t be afraid to talk to strangers or take risks to share Jesus with anyone! Then the possibilites of what God can do in and through me are endless!

Courage isn’t just something I have to keep in order to do well with the “big things” God has trusted me with; it is something I need to have EVERYDAY (say in nacho voice, if you know what I’m talking about ha). I am clinging to Jesus- my COURAGE- through Him all things are possible!

We just finished Exodus in our Bible reading plan. We read about Israel’s birth as a nation, the Ten Commandments, and God’s moral law and righteous requirements for his people. Throughout all of the book of Exodus, God’s redemptive grace and power are displayed. The book also shows us what true worship is and that it should come from people who have a personal relationship with him. Also it showed us how God supernaturally rescued his people from sin! I couldn’t help but to continue reading in the book of numbers.

Numbers is a little different. Most of the book describes Israel’s experiences while wandering in the desert. While it’s a book that is a continuation of the history recorded in the book of Exodus, it picks up as they have spent about a year at Mount Sinai, where God established a life agreement with them.

We know that the book of Numbers was written to explain why Israel did not enter the promised land right away after leaving Mount Sinai. It illustrates how God requires his people to have faith in order to fulfill His plans and claim His promises. What really gets me is that this book also shows the consequences and judgements for rebellion, but shows how God’s ongoing purposes will be realized. So, with that said, we know that the primary message of Numbers is clear: We, God’s children, can only make progress by depending on Him, trusting His promises and obeying His word.

I was reading in Hebrews and came across this passage,

“7 That is why the Holy Spirit says, “Today when you hear his voice, 8 don’t harden your hearts as Israel did when they rebelled, when they tested me in the wilderness. 9 There your ancestors tested and tried my patience, even though they saw my miracles for forty years. 10 So I was angry with them, and I said, ‘Their hearts always turn away from me. They refuse to do what I tell them.’11 So in my anger I took an oath: ‘They will never enter my place of rest (Hebrews 3:7-11).”

This passage is quoting Psalm 95:7-11, and obviously the writer is referring to Israel’s disobedience in the desert after their exodus from slavery in Egypt.

v8 says, “Don’t harden your hearts as Israel did when they rebelled, when they tested me in the wilderness.”

*This is a warning for us who have a renewed relationship with God because of the life and sacrifice of Christ.

What happened to the people of Israel when they were in unbelief? Not just unbelief but the disobedience in their hearts? It was like they didn’t even hear God’s command or His warning to resist sin? They became disloyal to the one who freed them from bondage.

This is the same question that I have to ask myself. What happens when I become like them?

When we go on sinning, we cheat ourselves, others and God. The people of Israel were basically banned from entering the promise land, and the same thing happens to us. Our hearts will become harder and harder and we will soon not hear God/ want to hear God because we will be so consumed with ourselves and our own thing. When we start doing our own thing, God will keep us from what He has planned (the Promise Land).

The crazy part is that we don’t have to make the same ‘big’ mistakes that these people made to end up with a heart of stone, or to be so consumed with ourselves that we don’t hear God. Even the little things will get us there. The smallest compromise or the tiniest ounce of laziness could keep us from what God has planned. And that plan isn’t small either. It involves others, so it’s all the more important that we live at a higher standard of humility and holiness every day.

Even though chapters 26-36 of the book of Numbers records that the next time the people of Israel stood at the border of the promise land, it was a while new genteration of people. This is how we know that if one generation fails, God will raise up  another one to fulfill his promises and carry out His mission.

Right now, lets be a part of the generation that says I will obey, no matter how crazy it sounds.

How will anyone know that you look favorably on me—on me and on your people—if you don’t go with us? For your presence among us sets your people and me apart from all other people on the earth.” (Exodus 33:16 NLT)

I was reading this the other day and this line popped out to me,

“… For your presence among us sets your people and me apart from all other people on the earth.”

Moses was saying this to God when he was told to take the people of israel to the promise land. Moses knew this was true and that the difference between them and everyone else in the world was recognizable.

I read this and I was thinking to myself, “is there a recognizable difference between me and the rest of the world? How recognizable is it?” (I encourage you to ask yourself the same questions).

If God’s presence is constantly with you and directing your life, I believe there will be a difference in you thats seen by others and makes a difference in others. When we have God’s presence in us we are full of joy, completely fearless, and overflowing with love. We have a hope that the world around us desperate for and a purpose for living. Are you consumed in His presence?

Love Beyond Our Dreams…

Think about that statement for just a moment… What does it mean to you? What does it mean for your future? Who is your dreaming impacting? When I sit back and think about that statement or those questions long enough I begin to realize the magnitude of what all of it means.

When I was learning about Love Beyond My Dreams the example used to help identify with was Joseph, The Dreamer (Genesis 37). Now I was intrigued by his dreams and how the meaning for his dream to him meant power over his family, but that same dream with God’s help was actually helping to fulfill the promise God made to Abraham. I kept thinking about this and was curious if there were any other stories in the Bible about men with dreams, and what God did with their dreams. I found that  another guy named Solomon had a dream (1 Kings 3). In fact in his dream God was going to give him anything he wanted, but Solomon asked for wisdom to lead Israel. Blown away by his response God gave him wisdom, wealth and popularity, just because he had a dream for more then himself.

Both of these are awesome dreams that God worked through to bring about His ultimate purpose. If we as Christians are going to reach a world that is straight up lost with out Him, we must begin to Love Beyond Our Dreams. Our dreams have to be about more then just what we want or hope for, but they need to be for people, ways to get the love of Christ into each heart you come in contact with so that they will no face to end result; Hell. Our dreams may sound like this, “Man, I want to open up my own Gym.” When you give that same dream to God it sounds more like this, “God, I want to have open a place where students can come together and hang out, be safe, and learn your love.”

We have been in a series here at RC and it is more then just another sermon series from our Pastor, it is the theme and dream for us as a church: LOVE TO LIVE IT! Dreams are awesome, but if we do not wake up and put action to that dream, then it will only ever be a dream. We must love beyond the dream so that when we wake up it becomes reality.

“Don’t be a well intention dragon- you mean well, but then you burn people” Pastor Chilly

My words often get me into trouble. I get a little crazy, I start blabbing, add some sarcasm, and then bam- ouch someone gets hurt. The series Pastor Chilly is speaking on is called “Love to Live it” and I have to love to talk like Jesus talked- I have to LIVE it out and then Love it! Unfortunately it can be so easy to be the negative Nancy, but Gods calling me to beyond that selfishness so he can create me into an encourager.

Being a dragon always gets you into some trouble…the XMin girls and I have experienced this, recently. Each of us have said things, crossed some lines, and then in result- assumptions, bitterness, anger- was created, and some got burned. And I know that each of us are well intention girls, I believe we all want to see people come to Jesus and see Courage explode, but our way of going about it was not always uplifting, but selfish. We weren’t backing each other up, we weren’t validating each other, pointing out the good in each other…I became a dragon. It’s not fair to the girls and its not fair to the people we minister to because it was affecting them. So what needed to happen? We had to confess, we had to ask for forgiveness, we had to forgive, and then we had to love (and hug).

Now I choose to be the one who cheers for them, loves them unconditionally, serves them whole-heartdly, finds the good in them, puts courage in them, treats them as an individual who matters.

“I go East, but He is not there. I go west, but I cannot find Him. I do not see Him in the north, for He is hidden. I look to the South, but He is concealed. BUT, He KNOWS where I am going! and when He test me, I will come out as pure gold..But once He has made His decision, who can change His mind? Whatever He wants to do He does. So He will do whatever He has planned. He controls my destiny!” Job 23:-10 + 13-14

I love this, Job does not understand why his life so quickly became a disaster, why his friends are stinky, and why he is so suddenly distanced from God. Yet, puts his faith in him because God knows and is in control! And because of that Job knows God is going to refine him through every trial, making him pure as gold. MMm I lOVE that! I want to be like Job where I find the faith to say, “Ok God even if you take this away you do whatever you want because it is what you planned”  Gods plans are always good, they are meant for good and not disaster. I think as humans we have control issues, but isn’t a relief that we can lose control and put our trust in a GREAT and All KNOWING and ALL POWERFUL God! He does not put us through trials to make our lives suck- we have the choice of coming out ugly or as beautiful as gold, it all depends on the way we try to control or handle the fire. SO who controls your destiny? You or God?

A verse that has been burning up inside of me for like 2 weeks now is, “Passion for God’s house will consume me” John 2: 17. This verse seriously hits every area of my life on the head. How can I stand infront of a room of teenagers or lead a leadership team, or serve my team and Pastor, or love the kids Wednesday nights, or reach out Sundays for two services, if I have no passion? It just does not work. (caution: I am writing everything that is coming to mind)

Passion does not come from always being hyper, jumping, or laughing a lot, so you may think.Ha..so I may think…Yes,Jesus gives me joy and those things are just a special little plus that Gods adds, but Passion for Jesus is not based on feeling.

I am learning that it all starts in your quite time with Jesus. It starts early in the morning and ends late at night. It’s found in prayer and reading the word ( the times when you eat up every word like it is ice cream). Passion for Jesus lets him work through all of your ickyness (or lets get serious sin), purifying you and being joyful about it! Passion is when I never stop praying throughout my day, consistently asking God and letting Him lead. THEN, when I get into the flow of my day it will be unforced, easy, genuine, and real Passion. So if you feel like you have been at a point in your faith where its just dry….spend sometime ALONE with Jesus (you can’t rely on someones else’s faith, you need to get your own) and get crazy excited about what he is saying and how he is changing you!

Lately God has really been challenging me to get to know Him better. Having been raised in the church, I’ve had the blessing and the curse of hearing a lot of different people’s view of God and His character. Though I have learned a lot over the years, I think I can tend to get lazy because of the information I have at my fingertips. My relationship with God cannot be based solely on information I have heard from someone else though. I have to be learning more of God for myself daily. God is so infinite that I will never know enough of Him, so I must pursue Him more and more. The God I know today, will not be enough for tomorrow. I need to be in hot pursuit of Him every chance I get. This means really jumping into His Word and seeing what He has to say for Himself.